it finally happened yesterday - i picked up a crazy old man who freaked me out on an instinctual level. i even pulled a knife on him, and that bloodshot gaze never changed. he explained he'd recently got of prison. a carjacker doesn't typically tell a sob story about prison while letting his mark pull a knife on him, so i wasn't sure where we stood. in the end, he was basically just a greedy dude who still feared jesus in some way. i wished him luck and drove away, knife balanced on my knees.

it's called the arkansas toothpick, and mine has a man wrestling a bull embossed onto a copper hilt. got this one in olympia, though, from a head shop run by an old, mean chinese family.

i didn't lock my car once in three years while living in conway. all that ever happened was that i once noticed my receiver's faceplate was gone, then found it a week or so later at the top of the driveway. speakers didn't work anyway.

i remember one time, when i was fairly young, dad challenged me to tell him what the word "just" means. i couldn't, and he couldn't either.

the first time i genuinely hated someone for being very stupid was when i was fifteen. i couldn't yet drive, but nick could, and he's only three weeks older. that puts it in early november 2000, just before i decided to start growing my hair out of boredom. his cousin and i were visiting out at nanny's in southwest, and the poor kid, three years younger, was purely and innocently ignorant, with absolutely no malice. and we all got stoned, and he went on and on and on about how "hey guys, what if THIS is the dream world, and when we're asleep that's when we're actually AWAKE. for real yall hold on for real yall think about it." yeah man, cos when we dream, we dream about going to school all day and getting high in a storage room for the eighth friday in a row.

just sayin: fuck that guy.